Blue Lightning Never Giving Up

Hello to all.

My name is Blue Lightning.

I am only 19. Just got out of high school last year.

My story…is a lengthy one. Every year of my life has been filled with hardships, anger, sadness, and pain. However there has been love.

Beginning from when I was first born, I was identified as having chronic kidney infections, spina bifida aculta (missing vertebra in my lower back), ADD, and keratosis pilarous (a form of eczema). From the get go, I was very different…and I knew it.

At the age of two, I nearly died from my infections. My parents were told I was not going to make the night. I somehow pulled through, and was put on medication. Horse pills.

These pills made my immune system very weak for me later in life. I still have issues to this day.

In elementary school, I had to wear a watch that told me every two hours to use the bathroom. I was very much teased and bullied for this. They asked if I was that stupid to forget to use the potty. This was on top of the bullying I reviewed for attending a private school when my family was so poor. Everyone else was rich.

Luckily I convinced my parents to put me in a public school for 5th grade. By this time, I had underwent the corrective surgery to reconstruct my defect. So no more watch. Woo.

When I entered 5th grade, I finally made a good friend, whom I still have contact with to this day. She introduced me to Balto and wolves. I was so hooked it sparked my lifelong passion: art. I began drawing all over everything I could, practicing every day. I got very much in trouble for thus, but I didn’t care. I had found my calling. I guess you could say I was a lucky one, finding my “cutie mark” so early. This was not the case.

I became so enthralled with it, children in my class began teasing me for it, calling me a wolf obsessed freak, when it was the only thing I knew how to draw, and if I was caught with any reference pictures, the teachers would take them. Kids would howl at me in the halls. My only friend was my salvation. I still thank her to this day for striving me to continue.

Finally middle school. I asked to be included in a art class, however I never got in all three years. During these three years I found the internet and began making more friends than ever over two things; Pokemon and the game okami. I’d go to three library every day during lunch and surf the Web.

High school. Bullying was becoming less and less a challenge, however in middle school I had developed a habit of being lazy. My parents, especially my father, did not take kindly to that. They knew my passion was art, and they’d take that away from me. What he didn’t know is that you can’t just simply take someone’s love. I drew on lined paper, as much as it bothered me.

Freshman year I finally got an art class! I was so excited. My art classes were the only ones I got good grades in. At this time I was living with my father full time after a large spat with my mother and her boy toy. My passion was still art, but little did I know that my true calling was yet to be achieved. On the art room computers was Adobe Flash MX. I opened it, found it was an animation program…I was hooked. I used the computers every day after my main work was done…I only wish I could have kept some of the animations.

Sophomore year. I moved back to my mother. Changed school districts. I began making more friends but with some came relationships and heartbreak. It drove me to not caring about my looks or my hygiene, which had a bad effect on my heath. I have relapsed in kidney infections three times since then. Not a good thing when your right kidney is half the size it should be.

In junior year I found the fandom through a furry music artist, Renard Queenston. Once I began watching, I couldn’t stop until I caught up with the episodes. I began drawing the ponies as well. My friends noticed this and got onto me about it, but nothing more. It was all in good fun.

Graduation. Hardest days of my life. Leaving everyone behind was horrible.. But at the same tone I can say I still have contact frequently with many of them.

In December of last year I made a dumb decision. My fiancee and I moved to Phoenix, a thousand miles from where I am now. I hurt many in my family, but it, in the long run, strengthened my bond with them.

Fast forward to three weeks ago. I had to call the cops on my step father. He was beating and raping my mother. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.

In the past week, both my mom and my fiancee have told me they love me for who I am. I have never believed anyone in my life about that. I’m not the picture perfect model. I’m overweight, lazy, and I just got a new job.

I stumbled across the video tonight, doing my usual rounds on the Web. The video genuinely made me cry. It touched my heart in a way I didn’t think possible. I’ve been so closed hearted to everyone. I’ve never shared my feelings on fear of being put down or yelled at.

Because of you three, I now know how beautiful I really am. I can do anything if I put my mind to it. My dream us to be an animator for Pixar. I have yet to even begin schooling, but I draw every day to aim for that goal.

I am beautiful. I am me.

And boy is it great to be different.

-Blue, aka Hara

8 comments to Blue Lightning Never Giving Up

  • Jake THE snake™  says:

    Gosh dang it… Why do you have to make me cry of joy?! I wish you didn’t have to get hurt like you did. Sorry for all that’s happened, and STAY STRONG :)

  • light wave and steel  says:

    I have ADD and my friend has anisocoria so we are really great buddies. We’re both twelve and I’m born a day before him… Stay powerful

  • Purple Hyper Flame  says:

    Way to go Blue Lightening! ^,w,^

  • Blue Lily  says:

    *makes an account just so I can leave comments*

    Mwahahahaha—-I mean, hellooooo there~!! How are you all today? ~^.^~

    P. S. D: I wanna center and color my text…. ;(

    P. P. S. Dear Blue Hara Lightning:
    I used to draw abstract art on my college-ruled paper, then complain I didn’t have any left for writing; so I’d write on construction paper until I was caught. Lol. WEIRD FOREVER!! W0000T!! XD

  • Levi Rivaille  says:

    lay down try not to cry cry a lot

  • blackthunder  says:

    I feel the same way when I go to school the bullying needs to stop!!!!!!!!

  • SapphireRose  says:

    I Am going through the same thing But i have ADHD and its really hard getting through the day with out some one trying to hurt my feelings. I hope to have a better future and your story really inspires me to stay strong even through the tough times!

    ~ SapphireRose

    • Allison Theaker  says:

      I also have ADHD i understand wats happening to you

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